My friend Aragorn, a soon-to-be-a king came into a deep episode of nostalgia because of this feeling; nothing but a nice pair of Manolo Haldir's could make him feel any better. Was he loveless? sexless? He decided to consult those he thought could give him good advice: his Elders. As it was a must, he invited Elrond & sons to a quick elfic brunch in the hottest tavern and put them up to date.
- Aragorn: Guys, it's official. I'm asthenic.
- Elrohir: Eeks, does it itch?
- Aragorn: I mean I am in the need of something... more.
- Elladar: Yeah, I know what you mean, I felt the very same last month. Have you tried a bigger dildo?
- Elrond: Elladar, please!
- Elrohir: Erm, waiter, cancel my order, I don't feel like lembas any more...
- Elladar: Aw you pussies, what can be more important than that?
- Aragorn: Well, I don't know, that's what I'm trying to figure out.
- Elrond: Maybe you are looking for love, true, deep, intense love...
- Aragorn: Do you think so? I thought I had already found a...
- Elrohir: Aragorn likes a giiirl!
- Elrond: Aw my Gaud! Aragorn, you are getting married!! I know!!
- Elrohir: Gosh, do you really feel the need to marry everyone around you?
- Elladar: Yeah, why would one marry when you can have the whole unringed package...?
- Aragorn: Un-ringed.......?
- Elrond: What a disgusting expression! What can be more beautiful than sealing eternal love with your lover and a ring?
- Aragorn: ... and a ring...?
- Elrohir: You don't seal love with a ring, you just buy a few months of premarital sex...
A couple of blocks away, 6 hours and 3 brandywine's later, Aragorn was about to burst. Would the hole fill with love? with sex? with a ring? with... a ring? He suddenly remembered the song they used to sing, in where a king was seduced by a thing, which was a ring. Ding ding! Maybe it was it! Maybe their friends were wrong... or... could they be right, at the same time? It was THAT ring... Finally, he could fill the hole by finding the hollowed. Maybe, for us bachelors of Middle Earth, it all becomes a matter of rings, to own, to keep, to destroy, to give, to share... a ring. And all the rings make the chain that's, finally, us. You. Does it ring a bell? or, perhaps... it rings a ring?
Ring and the City, by Carrie Bradshaw